Then and Now (II)

The big event of last week was K's high school graduation ceremony. Four years later, BA still holds its grad at the same place on the same Thursday night.

I feel old. All those little kids that used to come to our house to play and have sleepovers have all become adults. It seems that they have all grown, but I am still stuck somewhere in time...

Being at that same place, my mind thought back to my own high school grad, and how different the feeling was compared to last week's university convocation...

20040624:
This evening was exciting. All 600+ of the class of 2004. Among them, many I had known for almost, if not more than, 10 years. The atmosphere was good. And for once, I could almost feel proud of myself, because the very last and most prestigious award of the night was presented to me. MM went around telling people she knows me. People congratulated my parents. For once, I accomplished something.

20080617:
Four years later, at this supposedly much more important university convocation, I felt nothing. I did not want to be there, and nobody else was excited about anything either. When I saw KL after the ceremony, she said to me, "You lied to me! You said you weren't good with academics, but you got high distinction!" I laughed, and thought, 'But it doesn't mean anything to anyone.' And that's the truth. Nobody knows what it means, and it's not enough to warrant anything.

I wish a certain someone could have been there at convo. And as impossible as it is, I wish that this same person could have been there four years ago.

I wish...