B-day Regrets

Today was the last day of classes for my first semester in grad school! Yay! Now...just have to get through the next seven days...with 3 exams, 2 assignments, and 2 recruitment events. Yikes!

Yesterday was M's birthday. Knowing that she hasn't been too happy being half way around the world from home, I did what I could do (hopefully) make the day a little better for her. I tried to round up some people to go for dinner, but with our insanely tight schedule, nobody was really willing to go. So it was just the two of us. But it turns out that's the way M wanted it. We went to a place near campus and had dinner and a drink. It wasn't anything really special, but I think M was pretty happy with it, considering she really didn't expect to have any sort of celebrations for her birthday.

Being the idiot that I am....of course...this very ordinary birthday celebration has already got me thinking a million things...

I went out of my way to give M a nice birthday today. But three years ago, I didn't do anything for X, who has been the most important person in my life. I had promised X very early on that I would have a nice dinner with her on her birthday, and I didn't. All I could do was buy her bubble tea and gave her the little teddy bear. And she even had to drive over to see me.

Felt so ridiculous that day. Still do now. And I don't even know if I'll ever have the chance to make up for it.

Heart-wrenching just thinking about it...

*sigh*