放開你去愛你?

Opened up a magazine today and the title of one article was "放開你去愛你".

In TV shows, it often happens that Person A and Person B are together. And then for whatever reason, Person A will give up on Person B and let go because Person A thinks that that's best for Person B. Exactly what it says...放開你去愛你. They always make it seem so sad and heroic, so that you feel sorry for Person A.

But I absolutely hate this phrase.

There was a point in time when I believed in this idea of letting go because you love the other person. At the time when I was struggling with things, I often said to X that she should let go and move on, because I would make her life miserable. Every time, she would say no, and tell me that she was willing to stay with me.

Until one time, I said it again, and X got mad at me.

X said it was very selfish of me to push her away because I thought that it would be better for her. I didn't understand. How was I being selfish when what I wanted was to stop giving her trouble?

She explained......I am not her, and I could never know what is best for her......because what she wanted most, was to be there with me. Me pushing her away was like robbing her of the last little bit that we shared.

Like a million other times......X made me cry.

放開你去愛你。
It's wrong.
It's selfish.
And I will never think that way again.