3/21....for the 5th time....

March 21st.....and a Sunday......just the same as it was then.......

I can't decide if my mind is blank today or if there's so much going through my mind that I can't pinpoint anything.  Just really out of it.

I told myself not to think today.  But while driving with the music on with everyone else dozing off, a lot of things came to mind......

The monkey that's been "imprisoned"...
The phone that's been erased...
The watch that I can no longer have...
The keys that I lost the privilege to...
The ring...that I lost...

It never really does fade from my memory.....

What have I achieved in all this time?  I don't know.  But I've been trying to change the rules of the game.  Whether or not things will work out in the end, I have no idea.  Nor is this the right time to find out.

All I wanted to do today was have some time to myself.  So much so that I shut off my phone last night and didn't turn it on at all today.  Just don't feel like talking to anyone.  I guess because I don't want people to notice that I'm in quiet and in a bad mood and start asking questions.

Unfortunately, I did not get any time alone today.  Kept having to deal with people about the stuff they're doing and planning.  Quite honestly, I started getting very irritated and despondent by the afternoon.  But sometimes you just have to suck it up and pretend it's all good, because having certain people notice my moodiness on this day would be a really bad thing.

On top of all this crap.....I'm really starting to see another big problem developing in my life......sh*t.

(Side note:  I know I probably piss some people off for missing calls on my cell, but that's the way it's gonna be, so live with it.  I'm not someone that likes to be found 24/7.  BUT...having said that, anyone that is moderately important to me should have my home number, so it shouldn't be a problem!  If you don't have it and would like to have it, ask me!)