The Smart Kid

So while chatting with a friend last night, she asked me how I was doing with school and exams and stuff.  When I answered that things were relatively easy for these few weeks, she said something about me being a "smart kid".

To that, I said that I pretend to be smart.

Earlier in the day, a friend sent me a message and asked me if I was interested in applying to the firm that she's working at.  Seeing as I haven't officially accepted my current offer, I said yes.  She told me to keep it low key because it was sort of a private thing, and that she was asking me because I was "crazy good".

To this, I just laughed.

For whatever reason, a lot of people have the impression that I'm very smart and very good at what I do.  Perhaps that's a good thing, because it means I have a pretty good reputation.  On the other hand, that also means I have to keep up with that and not screw up.

All my life, I've worked hard and have gotten good grades most of the time.  For the most part, I do admit I can spend relatively little time (compared to a lot of people) and still do relatively well.  I do admit that I have helped my teams win.  And I do admit that I've gotten prizes, awards and scholarships.  But I have never thought of myself as a smart kid.

I can guarantee that there are people in my class right now who have a lot more technical knowledge than I do.  But perhaps why I do better than them is because (1) I can communicate better than them and (2) I can make use of what (relatively little) I do know more skillfully and, in the end, give people the impression that I know what I'm talking about.

But the reality is...sometimes, I seriously do not know.

Having gone to seven or eight different schools/campuses during my lifetime, and having been in advanced placement programs, I've met a lot of smart people.  A lot of them have gone on to do great things with their lives.  There are people out there who know a lot more than I do and work a lot harder than I do.  Some of gone on to be doctors and consultants and entrepreneurs and what have you.  And, here I am, still in school.

They are the smart kids.

Me......I'm just playing my role, pretending to be smart, screwing up my life, fooling the world, trying to get to I don't know where.