Pink Dresses

Ran into R and C on the bus home today. Somehow, I was totally oblivious to the fact that R tried to call/text me from the back of the bus while I was standing near the front. Yes, I'm blind and deaf. =_=

Chat about the bus strike. Chat about Halloween. Chat about random things.

At one point, R told me she was looking around for a venue for her wedding. With that, she told me that they had chosen pink and black as the colours for the wedding. And then...

R: Are you okay with a baby pink dress? I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable.
Me: Yea, that's fine. Don't worry.

Well, what else can I say? =_=

At this point, I am totally dreading this. The idea of having to wear a pink dress in front of the world (including a lot of people that I haven't seen in ages) makes me wanna die. But for R, I'll do it.

The way that R has been so cautious with breaking all of this out to me makes me wonder what she's thinking. Is she always checking if I'm okay with the arrangements simply because she knows I don't want to wear a dress? Or is she asking because she knows what I'm hiding?

I really don't know. Nor do I have the courage to find out.

In this day and time, it wouldn't be that odd for a bridesmaid to not be wearing a dress. But the implications of doing so are too great. For a bridesmaid to not wear a dress makes a very big statement. Not a wise thing to do. For one thing, my own parents might be at the wedding. And what would R's parents think? Double negative.

Actually. It's not that I'm hiding anything. It's just that she's never asked. If she did, I would probably very skillfully admit it. After all, if I can't trust this person that I've known all my life, who can I trust?