1000

This is supposedly the 1,000th post in this blog.

Except...there are around twenty that are "drafts" and not posted.

Some are things that are ridiculously stupid and pointless that are really for my enjoyment only.  Perhaps they  represent the kid in me.  After all, once I find something I like/love, I'm a die hard fan.

Some are things involving people that I don't necessarily want to talk about "out loud".

Some are actual drafts, in the sense that I started writing something and never really got around to finishing, simply because I didn't.

Some are drafts, in the sense that I wanted to write something, but could never find a way to put it all into words.  Perhaps there are some things that simply can't be fully expressed by words.

Some are longer, more detailed, more private versions of things that I have posted.  After all, this is public space.  I don't mind writing things anonymously, but there is still a limit to how much I put out there.

And the first two, from way back, perhaps I'd like to keep to myself.  One was written in reply to something I read.  I sent it off, but sort of regret it.  The other I regret for even thinking and writing, but I don't want to erase a moment in time.

This place was started because I needed to leave the other one.  I wanted to "reserve" that one for its specific purpose.  And the purpose of this place?  It was meant to be out there for someone to find.  Whether or not that person has found it, I don't know.  I guess it still serves this purpose.  Or I hope it does.

Or, maybe it's simply just a place for me to let off steam.  Ironically, a lot of times I find it doesn't "work", because at the times when I'm most frustrated or depressed, I can't even bring myself to write.  I'm never very emotional in front of people, but the emotions are there and often enough to eat me alive.

1,000 posts over six years.  Almost exactly six years.

A lot has changed.  For better or worse?  I don't know.

A lot has stayed the same.  For better or worse?  I don't know.

The only thing for sure is that I'm still writing for the same reason.

People always say that time changes everything.

Maybe.

Or maybe not.

I'm a Taurus.
Loyal, stubborn and OCD as hell.