Saturday morning I was awakened (bright and early) by sounds outside. A group of loud Chinese people doing something outside. From the sounds of it, it was the beginning of a wedding, it was the groom and groomsmen picking up the bride. I peeked out the window and saw a line of cars across the street. I guess it might have been the house at the corner? Or, what interests me, maybe it was the first house on our street, the girl that I used to ride my bike with and go to summer camp with? After being woken up way too early, I really didn't care enough to wait and find out.
Coincidentally, the activity for the day for me on Saturday was also a wedding. I generally don't mind weddings, except for the dressing up part. This wedding yesterday, I guess I'm glad I could be a part of. After all, of all the distant relatives that are around the same age, she's the only one that I really know. This was an interesting wedding. What amazes me the most is the open-mindedness of the groom and his family. They did all the traditional Chinese wedding rituals, Chinese dinner, and the groom even made the effort to say a few words in Chinese for the bride's grandparents. I guess seeing the bride was also quite surprising. Seeing the athletic tomboy that I've always known in a wedding gown and high heels was quite a change. A part of me thinks she's pretty glad the whole thing is over now too. Anyhow, congrats to the both of them.
Yesterday morning I saw pictures from another person's wedding. They were nice pictures, and I genuinely hope that this person will be happy, but there's something at the back of my mind that gives me very mixed feelings about it. Anyhow, I'm not in the position to comment. It's really none of my business.
What can I say? I love seeing the happy couples tying the knot, but I also have to admit that it takes a bit of a toll on me every time. In so many ways, these events encompass all the things that I can't have/get. In so many ways, these events make me think.
All of a sudden, I'm reminded (once again) that for the past several years, I've stupidly tried to reach out to someone without any luck. It's at the point where I'm not even so sure I have the right address or number anymore and, yet, I've continued to try. And of course, still no luck. What am I trying to achieve? Sometimes I wonder if I even know. I've done a lot of stupid things, a lot of things that I never imagined I would do. All for the sake of hopefully hearing from this one person.
A while ago a friend asked me about the ring that I've been wearing. She asked me if there's a story behind it. The simple answer is no. That is an honest answer, just not a complete one. The ring I wear has no meaning, but it replaces one that does. The one that does is too obvious. It only fits on a particular finger and has a pattern that almost very clearly indicates a story. For sure, it would attract way too much unwanted attention.
If only I really would wear that ring......
Yesterday morning I saw pictures from another person's wedding. They were nice pictures, and I genuinely hope that this person will be happy, but there's something at the back of my mind that gives me very mixed feelings about it. Anyhow, I'm not in the position to comment. It's really none of my business.
What can I say? I love seeing the happy couples tying the knot, but I also have to admit that it takes a bit of a toll on me every time. In so many ways, these events encompass all the things that I can't have/get. In so many ways, these events make me think.
All of a sudden, I'm reminded (once again) that for the past several years, I've stupidly tried to reach out to someone without any luck. It's at the point where I'm not even so sure I have the right address or number anymore and, yet, I've continued to try. And of course, still no luck. What am I trying to achieve? Sometimes I wonder if I even know. I've done a lot of stupid things, a lot of things that I never imagined I would do. All for the sake of hopefully hearing from this one person.
A while ago a friend asked me about the ring that I've been wearing. She asked me if there's a story behind it. The simple answer is no. That is an honest answer, just not a complete one. The ring I wear has no meaning, but it replaces one that does. The one that does is too obvious. It only fits on a particular finger and has a pattern that almost very clearly indicates a story. For sure, it would attract way too much unwanted attention.
If only I really would wear that ring......
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