Halfway

One thing leads to another.  After re-watching Saving Face, I went on and found another movie to watch - Elena Undone.  This one got me more than I expected.  After all, how much can I relate to a woman married to a pastor with a teenage son?  Not much.  Or so I thought.

There's a lot in common when you find yourself falling for someone you could never even imagine.  All of a sudden, this person somehow shows up in your life and turns everything you ever knew upside down and throws you into a world that you barely even knew existed.  It's all so new, so scary, so confusing.  Yet, you let yourself into it because it feels so right.

There's a lot in common when you find yourself in an "illicit affair".  In the movie, perhaps it was, because Elena was married.  But it makes me feel horribly guilty to think that what I had was at some point labeled as an illicit affair.  Was I doing something illegal?  Was I cheating on someone?  No, and no.  But I do know why it was labeled as such, and it's entirely my fault.

There's a lot in common when you find yourself destroying the rest of your family while you try to find yourself.  Elena gave up her husband, but she didn't love him anyway.  Elena was lucky; her son understood.  I never had this luxury.  You can give up a lover that you no longer love, but you cannot give up family that brought you into this world.  What can I do?

Yet, none of these got me as much as the dialogue between Elena and Peyton in the park.  Peyton wants to pull back.  Elena wants to forge ahead, albeit carefully.  Elena says she doesn't want to go halfway.  Peyton's response......

"You ARE going halfway."